My darling child,
After waiting nearly a month, the day of our first consultation had finally arrived. Your Daddies were so nervous and had no idea what to expect, but we were excited nonetheless. We walked into Dr Chuong's office at the Cooper Institute for Reproductive Medicine, signed in, and were handed a stack of paperwork to fill out. That paperwork served as another reminder to us that we would be adventuring on a rarely taken path - on every form, we had to scratch out "wife" and insert "husband."
Once that was done, we were called back by a nurse named Nancy. Nancy was young and full of joy. Her cheerful disposition immediately put us at ease, but she wasted no time at all delving into the specifics of what was to come. Nancy's role was explaining the medical procedures. She spoke 100 miles an hour, used words that neither of us were familiar with, and gave us the rundown of seven months of work in under five minutes. When she left the room to go get the next nurse, your Daddy and I just looked at each other, wondering what in the world had just happened. It was very overwhelming, but Nancy was so sweet and optimistic that we decided to see what the next nurse had to say.
This nurse spoke even faster, used even bigger words, and had a very thick accent that made understanding any of it next to impossible. Her role in the consultation was to give us a sneak peek into the legal contracts, psychological evaluations, and other necessary non-medical processes that take place. By the time she had left the room, your Pappy and Daddy's heads were spinning. Hopefully everything she just said would be in the pamphlets she left behind for us to take home.
Finally, Dr Choung himself walked in. He was an older man and it was quite clear that he didn't have many gay friends. One of the first things he said to us in his heavy accent was, "Being gay is cool now, is it not?" It was actually very sweet, if you can picture it. He went on to tell us that he had only ever worked with one gay couple before who came in with two surrogates and both ended up getting pregnant with twins. Yikes! By the end of our consultation, we felt confident that we were in the right place for us, even if they weren't quite sure how to handle us. (One of our most favorite moments at the clinic happened one afternoon when we were about to leave, but Dr Chuong saw us in the hallway and asked us to wait. He came back with a photocopy he had made of an article about Gay Day at Disneyworld, a day that families with gay parents can come have fun without any fears in the back of their mind. Even though your Daddy and I don't feel the need to attend 'Gay Days,' it meant a whole, whole lot to us that our Dr, who still wasn't quite sure what to make of us, went out of his way to share something he was proud of and hoped would help our family.)
After leaving the consultation, we consulted with a lawyer who told us about the laws in Texas. It was possible, but long and expensive - even more than the IVF procedure. Even though we weren't thrilled that only one of us could be a legal parent at birth and that the other would have to "adopt" you once you were born, we didn't care. If that's what it took, that's what we would do. (Fate stepped in again later and revealed to us a much better plan.)
We now had all the information we needed to proceed. Most importantly, we knew how much money we needed to save and immediately began our diet of Ramen Noodle Soup and Hamburger Helper. And for the first time, it all felt so very real. Our baby was finally coming home.
We love you to the Moon and back,
Pappy and Daddy
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